Georgia and Auburn are not that different. Nearly every year both
teams end with a few losses, and both usually go to a mediocre
bowl game.

Auburn leads the overall series, a series that spans 105 years, by
four games. I would say that is fairly even.

Both teams have had famous coaches and fabulous running
backs, and this year, both young teams are searching for their
identity.

Sure, the schools have their obvious differences, but both are
strong SEC schools with a proud tradition in football and social
drunkeness.

With all of those likenesses being stated, why is it that Georgia
feels it is better than Auburn and feels the necessity to degrade
our school.

Instead of trying to figure out their screwed up logic, let me give you
the facts.

Every year about this time, Bulldog fans start talking smack about
how Georgia will beat Auburn and how Georgia is generally a
better school than Auburn.

The last two Hedge Wars have been good for the Tigers. Going
into both of those games, Georgia fans taunted the Auburn faithful,
and it came back to haunt them.

This year is no exception. Georgia is taunting and Auburn is
listening … for now. Georgia is picked to win the battle again this
year, but the Dawgs have not beat Auburn since 1998 and haven’t
defeated the Tigers in Athens since 1991. Damn, that seems like
a long time ago.

So what are Georgia fans thinking when they make false promises
of defeating Auburn?

Well, it could be the fact that the Dawgs have defeated similar
opponents that Auburn has.

No, that couldn’t be it because Georgia can’t beat Florida. Sure,
Georgia has beaten Tennessee twice, and that is an
accomplishment considering Georgia’s won only 12 of the 31
meetings between the two.

Maybe Georgia feels it will beat Auburn this year, because it has a
higher ranking in the polls than the Tigers.

Lately though, the underdog has won, and when at least one of the
two teams has been ranked, Auburn has won 22 of the 27
meetings.

Maybe Georgia thinks it has a higher talent level or better
individuals than Auburn.

Well it couldn’t be that either, because every preseason football
magazine I own listed Auburn with better talent and a better
recruiting class.

And about having better individuals: I don’t recall any Auburn
players stealing phone codes to make free long distance calls,
and no recollection comes to mind of the last time an Auburn
player offered a fake prostitute money for sex.

Yet, I always hear how much classier Georgia is than Auburn.
Pandering and theft, very classy. After all, even an “inbred redneck”
(a name I have been called by Georgia fans) can see how stupid
one must be to attempt either of those acts.

So really, Georgia folks have no basis for their arrogance. For a
group that prides themselves on being classier and says they’re a
more intelligent group, it does not make sense to make false
statements about Auburn. But hey, it’s working in our favor. So by
all means, keep talking trash.

The only logical explanation for Georgia’s empty taunts is
jealousy.

After all, jealousy breeds contempt, and the contemptuous asses
in Athens say they are better but never prove it. I am not going to
get into the name calling and trash talking, because I’m an Auburn
man and that’s not our style.

Tell you Georgia fans what. To show I have no hard feelings
toward your mindless BS, I’ll bring you back the hedges I ripped off
your tacky bushes in 1999. I enjoyed them, but I feel it is time to get
some fresh hedge this Saturday. WAR EAGLE!

– Brandon Patterson is the sports editor of The Auburn
Plainsman.