Stars and stripes

Independence Day means holiday fun, big responsibility for you and yours

It’s the end of June, which means that Independence Day is just around the corner. If nothing else, it’s important to remember that the Fourth of July is that rare holiday which combines three sacred American traditions: eating slabs of red meat, drinking cheap beer and making things explode.

If you’re planning on your Fourth involving any combination of these three, here are some pointers for putting the “fun” back in “fundamental American tradition:”

- Avoid shooting fireworks into crowds. Unfortunately, one person’s fun is too often another’s lost arm. If you must blow off an arm, though, make sure you don’t have a Short Session I final the next morning.

- Always have a designated fuse lighter.

- … or, if you just like to watch, check out the fireworks display at Bishop Park. Family friendly meets fire … what could be better?

- And last, it’s important to remember that holiday pastimes should be enjoyed solely in the presence of responsible individuals of the appropriate age.

- God bless America.

Fun Gone Wrong?

Here’s where you can call in case of an Independence Day-related emergency:

- Athens Regional Medical Center (706) 475-7000

- St. Mary’s Hospital (706) 389-3000

- Oh yeah, and 911

Big Brother’s car

Star 94 contest lets participants live dream of being forced to sleep in SUV

When asked to name America’s favorite past-times, a few things come to mind: baseball, apple pie and making a public spectacle out of oneself.

This month Atlanta radio station Star 94 drafted eight people, including a University student, to live in Mercury Mariner SUVs inside North Point Mall. With the exception of bathroom breaks every three hours, the contenders must remain inside the car at all times and sit. Their only form of entertainment? Staring back at the people staring at them.

The victims, or participants of the contest, are shamed not only by those who happen to be at the mall, however. Live broadcasts from the mall update viewers as to what the contestants are up to.

Further, a webcam has been set up on location to provide 24-hour access to the contestants, who are more than likely just sitting around.

If you ever wanted to play Big Brother, this is definitely your chance. After all, what better way to spend your life than watching someone else sit around for weeks at a time?

The irony of the contest will be revealed after the winner is announced. After spending a month or more in the car virtually nonstop, will he or she actually want to spend any more time in it?