In the ambiguous world of dating in college, it seems nothing is black and white but shades of gray. You might have gone on a couple of dates, spent weeks upon weeks hanging out with each other – hell, you might have even had sex, but the boundaries surrounding your “relationship” remain unclear.

These easy breezy situations are abundant in the college atmosphere, where most people accept an online site to dictate whether they and their partner are “official.” But what about the time before the guy you’ve been dating for the past three months sends the ever establishing “relationship request” and a little heart pops up in the news feed of your 789 closest friends?

Are you a free agent until the two of you sit down and have “the talk?”

The defining acts of cheating are pretty universal when things are serious. If you kiss someone other than your boyfriend, you cheated. If you sleep with your girlfriend’s roommate when she’s out of town, you cheated.

But what about when you hook up with someone who isn’t the person you’ve been steadily, yet casually, dating for the past few months … did you cheat?

It’s in this gray area of dating that I can’t seem to find a clear answer. I’m not what most would define as a “relationship person.” It’s been two years since my last serious boyfriend.

However, I don’t identify with the qualifications of a “serial dater” either. When it comes to dating, I fall in the gray area because I usually like to pick one horse and bet on it until it fails me miserably on the tracks.

And it’s in this style of dating I usually find myself wondering what really defines cheating?

I understand that you have no legitimate argument until you and whomever you’re romantically attracted to decide to become exclusive. And I would honestly say I’m not one who just wants to jump the gun and define boundaries with someone I haven’t really gotten to know.

But it seems becoming exclusive is the only way to protect yourself from being one out of several people you partner is seeing.

I can only speak from my point of view because, although I have many talents, mind reading is not one of them. Personally, I prefer to avoid the sloppier styles of bouncing between several people at the same time – it’s just unsanitary.

So if I’m dating a guy for any extended period of time, I kind of expect the same treatment. Because, honestly, nothing ruins the euphoric effects of a really great goodnight kiss like wondering where that mouth has been the past two nights you didn’t see each other.

That being said, I’m not fully at the opposite end of the spectrum either. Meaning, I don’t believe seeing the guy I’ve been dating for a few months downtown with another girl warrants Lorena Bobbit-type behavior.

I just think in this modern world of dating without boundaries, if you and the person you’re with are collectively headed down the same path – the path that leads to an exclusive relationship – there should be some modern rules to establish a few confines just to protect yourself.

Let’s face it – you might be holding out for marriage or maybe you just like to wait until you’re a few months into a relationship, but odds are the person you’re with probably doesn’t share these views. And the person they’re hooking up with might not either.

So when your innocent kiss goodnight leaves behind a little present that requires prescriptions to disappear, you might not think their actions were cheating, but they were definitely gross.

- Samantha Shelton is a junior from Auburn majoring in newspapers. She doesn’t really care what you do in your personal life until it’s with the guy she’s dating.